Canadian Idiot

[Le Messor]

from 'Weird Al' Yankovic's new album "Straight Outta Lynwood", released Sept / Oct '06 (I got it a week ago, first chance I had).

Based on Green Day's "American Idiot":

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot
Don't wanna be some beer-swillin' hockey nut
And do I look like some frostbitten hosehead?
I never learned my alphabet from A to Zed

They all live on donuts and moose meat
And they leave the house without packing heat
Never even bring their guns to the mall
And you know what else is too funny?
Their stupid Monopoly money
Can't take 'em seriously at all

Well, maple syrup and snow's what they export
They treat curling just like it's a real sport
They think their silly accent is so cute
Can't understand a thing they're talkin' aboot

Sure, they've got their national health care
Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air
Then again, well, they've got Celine Dion
Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni
And dream of drivin' a Zamboni
All over Saskatchewan

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot
Won't figure out the temperature in Celsius
See the map, they're hovering right over us
Tell you the truth, it makes me kinda nervous

Always hear the same kind of story
Break their nose, and they'll just say "Sorry!"
Tell me, what kinda freaks are that polite?
It's gotta mean they're all up to something
So quick, before they see it coming
Time for a pre-emptive strike

[Guardian]

:lol: Hey, I'm not Canadian and I've always wanted to drive a zamboni. Don't know why, just do. :)

[Canucklehead]

Can't understand a thing they're talkin' aboot

I'm still baffled by this one. Is this an Ontario thing? I've been to every province except ON and never have I heard someone say "aboot". Americans say "abaw't" we may say "abow-oot" but the "bow" is there. There's no "boot".

Anyways...

[Transmetropolitan]

I've heard Canadians say "aboat" in B.C., Yukon, and Alberta, but I've never heard "aboot."

[HappyCanuck]

I've lived in Western Canada my whole life, and have been raised around Newfies (my mother's side is Newfie), and never ONCE have I heard anything but 'abowt'...

[Canucklehead]

We seem to pronounce every letter in the word. "ab-ow-oo-t" so maybe that's what people hear, the last "oot", but the "ow" is there. We also seem to pronounce "route" as "root" like a bus route. So maybe that also plays into it. And the top of a house is a roof, which at least on some US shows(like Home Improvement) seems to be pronounced "ruff". We clearly pronounce it as it's spelled, roof.

[Legerd]

I think the whole thing is based on the Scottish accent that abounds through out Canada, but moreso (at least in the past) in the Maritimes. But if we must blame someone for this ongoing bad joke, let's blame South Park!

[Canucklehead]

I think the whole thing is based on the Scottish accent that abounds through out Canada, but moreso (at least in the past) in the Maritimes. But if we must blame someone for this ongoing bad joke, let's blame South Park!

Here in the Maritimes, we have some crazy accents, though "aboot" is not one of them. One thing that is very noticeable, well, about our "about"s and "what"s is that some of us add a bit to the "T" at the end. It's almost impossible to spell out but I will try. It's kind of like "about-hhh" and "what-hhh". Like the T continues into a sigh or hhh. Especially PEIslanders, eh Ben? 8)

[Legerd]

I think the whole thing is based on the Scottish accent that abounds through out Canada, but moreso (at least in the past) in the Maritimes. But if we must blame someone for this ongoing bad joke, let's blame South Park!

Here in the Maritimes, we have some crazy accents, though "aboot" is not one of them. One thing that is very noticeable, well, about our "about"s and "what"s is that some of us add a bit to the "T" at the end. It's almost impossible to spell out but I will try. It's kind of like "about-hhh" and "what-hhh". Like the T continues into a sigh or hhh. Especially PEIslanders, eh Ben? 8)

Sure, make me out to be a liar! :evil: Actually, I meant that I think the "aboot" is a parody of the Scottish accent which would be more prevalent in the Maritimes as there were many Scottish immigrants who came to live there. So... :P

I have got to learn to write out my thoughts better.

[Le Messor]

On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you have 10 times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you would never do that.

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As a way of our apology, please accept all of our Canadian NHL teams, which one by one are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different: Everyone knew he had weapons.

I'm sorry we burnt down your White-House during the war of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

I'm sorry for Alan Thicke, Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Lover Boy, the song from Sheriff that ends with the high pitched end note, your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way, which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with. For 22 Minutes, I'm Anthony St.Joseph, I'm Canadian. And I'm sorry.

[Legerd]

:lol: Hey, I'm not Canadian and I've always wanted to drive a zamboni. Don't know why, just do. :)

Congrats Guardian, you've earned this then:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/Legerd/honourarycanadiancopy.jpg

[Transmetropolitan]

On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you have 10 times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you would never do that.

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As a way of our apology, please accept all of our Canadian NHL teams, which one by one are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different: Everyone knew he had weapons.

I'm sorry we burnt down your White-House during the war of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

I'm sorry for Alan Thicke, Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Lover Boy, the song from Sheriff that ends with the high pitched end note, your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way, which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with. For 22 Minutes, I'm Anthony St.Joseph, I'm Canadian. And I'm sorry.

Speaking as a Yankee....

You, sir, are my hero.

[Le Messor]

:) Give it to "Anthony St. Joseph". I'm not even Canadian. Never been there. :(

[Legerd]

:) Give it to "Anthony St. Joseph". I'm not even Canadian. Never been there. :(

The comedian's real name is Colin Mochrie, you might know him from such shows as: This Hour Has 22 Minutes, and Whose Line Is It Anyway (the American version).

Here's a link to the video:

http://www.devilducky.com/media/50075/

[Canucklehead]

I think the whole thing is based on the Scottish accent that abounds through out Canada, but moreso (at least in the past) in the Maritimes. But if we must blame someone for this ongoing bad joke, let's blame South Park!

Here in the Maritimes, we have some crazy accents, though "aboot" is not one of them. One thing that is very noticeable, well, about our "about"s and "what"s is that some of us add a bit to the "T" at the end. It's almost impossible to spell out but I will try. It's kind of like "about-hhh" and "what-hhh". Like the T continues into a sigh or hhh. Especially PEIslanders, eh Ben? 8)

Sure, make me out to be a liar! :evil: Actually, I meant that I think the "aboot" is a parody of the Scottish accent which would be more prevalent in the Maritimes as there were many Scottish immigrants who came to live there. So... :P

I have got to learn to write out my thoughts better.

haha sorry man, didn't mean it like that. You're right about the Scottish accents in the maritimes, I was just saying I never heard the "aboot" here.

"Again on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry." :P

Gotta love Colin Mochrie

[Guardian]

:lol: Hey, I'm not Canadian and I've always wanted to drive a zamboni. Don't know why, just do. :)

Congrats Guardian, you've earned this then:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v305/Legerd/honourarycanadiancopy.jpg

Thanks! I'm speechless. \:D/

[Canucklehead]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

[HappyCanuck]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

... Ahhh, memories of me 13th birt'day, me b'y... mind, considering my mother's side of the family is Newfie, you'd think I'd get grandfathered in or something.... :?

[Canucklehead]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

... Ahhh, memories of me 13th birt'day, me b'y... mind, considering my mother's side of the family is Newfie, you'd think I'd get grandfathered in or something.... :?

Haha nice. Only in Newfoundland is it acceptable to kiss a cod before kissin a girl 8)

[Guardian]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

... Ahhh, memories of me 13th birt'day, me b'y... mind, considering my mother's side of the family is Newfie, you'd think I'd get grandfathered in or something.... :?

Haha nice. Only in Newfoundland is it acceptable to kiss a cod before kissin a girl 8)
You silly Canadians! :lol:

[syvalois]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

Is that supposed to make sense?

[Canucklehead]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

Is that supposed to make sense?

I think it's to confuse the tourists haha

[Legerd]

Ha, there's a scene for OF! Beta Ray Bill and USAgent kissing cod! :lol:

[Canucklehead]

Ha, there's a scene for OF! Beta Ray Bill...kissing cod! :lol:

I don't know which I'd pity more, Bill or the cod 8)

[syvalois]

Shouldn't we Screech him in? I got the Screech and the Cod ready. Pucker up Guardian 8)

(For those who don't know, to become an honorary Newfoundlander you have to take a shot of Screech, resite a few lines of text and kiss a cod.)

Is that supposed to make sense?

I think it's to confuse the tourists haha

I must be a tourist, what is screech? a drink?

[Canucklehead]

I must be a tourist, what is screech? a drink?

Yeah Screech is a Newfoundlander drink. Here's the story behind it:

As the story goes, the commanding officer of the original detachment was having his first taste of Newfoundland hospitality and, imitating the custom of his host, downed his drink in one gulp. The American's blood-curdling howl, when he regained his breath, brought the sympathetic and curios from miles around rushing to the house to find out what was going on. The first to arrive was a garrulous old American sergeant who pounded on the door and demanded, "What the cripes was that ungodly screech?"

The taciturn Newfoundlander who had answered the door replied simply, "The Screech? 'Tis the rum, me son."

A legend was born!. As word of the incident spread, the soldiers, determined to try this mysterious "Screech" and finding its effects as devastating as the name implies, adopted it as their favourite.

http://www.newfoundlandlabrador.com/history/screech.asp

[Guardian]

Ha, there's a scene for OF! Beta Ray Bill and USAgent kissing cod! :lol:

:lol:

[Guardian]

I must be a tourist, what is screech? a drink?

Yeah Screech is a Newfoundlander drink. Here's the story behind it:

As the story goes, the commanding officer of the original detachment was having his first taste of Newfoundland hospitality and, imitating the custom of his host, downed his drink in one gulp. The American's blood-curdling howl, when he regained his breath, brought the sympathetic and curios from miles around rushing to the house to find out what was going on. The first to arrive was a garrulous old American sergeant who pounded on the door and demanded, "What the cripes was that ungodly screech?"

The taciturn Newfoundlander who had answered the door replied simply, "The Screech? 'Tis the rum, me son."

A legend was born!. As word of the incident spread, the soldiers, determined to try this mysterious "Screech" and finding its effects as devastating as the name implies, adopted it as their favourite.

http://www.newfoundlandlabrador.com/history/screech.asp

Mmmm...alcohol.
Hey I'll get ya some moonshine and you can become an honourary red-neck American. :D

[Le Messor]

I got this from: http://www.snopes.com/glurge/skelton.htm


"O Canada": I see mountains and valleys and rivers and trees; it is truly Mother Nature's warehouse.

"Our home and native land": A place where families live with dignity on rich soil that shares food and beauty.

"True patriot": Patriotism, a pride, a privilege to say, I, me, an individual, a committee of one, and dedicate all my worldly goods, to give without self-pity.

"love in all thy sons command": That powerful youth that gives all their love and devotion, holding the standard with the Maple Leaf high in the air; for it is a symbol of courage and wherever she waves, she shouts "Freedom is everybody's job."

"With glowing hearts we see thee rise": A warmth that incubates incentive; wisdom that feeds beyond superstition and ignorance.

"the true north strong": She is that compass needle that points to inspiring reality, and the courage to struggle on, to find a dream and make it come true.

"and free": That right of power for one to live his own life without fear or stress or any sort of retaliation.

"And stand on guard, O Canada": Not that we want to flaunt our strength, but to be capable of facing the strongest should that enemy appear.

"We stand on guard for thee": we protect all doctrines and share thy spirit of logic and reasoning.

"O Canada, glorious and free!": That means justice, the principle and qualities of dealing fairly with others.

"O Canada , we stand on guard for thee": So we can stand proud and say to our neighbor, "This is as much my country as it is yours."

[Canucklehead]

I got this from: http://www.snopes.com/glurge/skelton.htm


"O Canada": I see mountains and valleys and rivers and trees; it is truly Mother Nature's warehouse.

"Our home and native land": A place where families live with dignity on rich soil that shares food and beauty.

"True patriot": Patriotism, a pride, a privilege to say, I, me, an individual, a committee of one, and dedicate all my worldly goods, to give without self-pity.

"love in all thy sons command": That powerful youth that gives all their love and devotion, holding the standard with the Maple Leaf high in the air; for it is a symbol of courage and wherever she waves, she shouts "Freedom is everybody's job."

"With glowing hearts we see thee rise": A warmth that incubates incentive; wisdom that feeds beyond superstition and ignorance.

"the true north strong": She is that compass needle that points to inspiring reality, and the courage to struggle on, to find a dream and make it come true.

"and free": That right of power for one to live his own life without fear or stress or any sort of retaliation.

"And stand on guard, O Canada": Not that we want to flaunt our strength, but to be capable of facing the strongest should that enemy appear.

"We stand on guard for thee": we protect all doctrines and share thy spirit of logic and reasoning.

"O Canada, glorious and free!": That means justice, the principle and qualities of dealing fairly with others.

"O Canada , we stand on guard for thee": So we can stand proud and say to our neighbor, "This is as much my country as it is yours."

Very nice! (Although Red Skelton pulled a Brian Adams and messed up a couple lines 8) )

Still very nice though. Thank you Messor :D

[cmdrkoenig67]

Canadian's should be apologizing for all those great Canadian-produced TV shows too... :wink:

Dana

[Le Messor]

Okay, I'm reviving a three-year-old thread here, but I just want to say...

I heard "Weird Al" Yankovic's Canadian Idiot last night!{guardian}
Okay, I've heard it many times.
But last night, it was LIVE! I've got the red and white streamers to prove it.
\\:D/

- Le Messor
"Everybody's got a cell phone, so come on people, let's be real!"
- 'Weird Al''s new, Michael-Stipe-based song
(not really)

[MajorMountie]

I love "Weird Al" and I am devastated I haven't been able to see him live yet. As for this song, I like it, I just wish it wasn't so "obvious". I prefer my "Weird Al" parodies to be clever and not so easily done.

[Le Messor]

I love "Weird Al" and I am devastated I haven't been able to see him live yet. As for this song, I like it, I just wish it wasn't so "obvious". I prefer my "Weird Al" parodies to be clever and not so easily done.

That was my second time. Of three possibles (I didn't have the money the second time he came to town).

- Le Messor
"I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!"